Thursday, February 24, 2011

thug story

last night sleep was horrendous. a swarm of moths had declared war, attacking the body parts i can't reach, feet and thigh.

the idea of shielding myself under the blanket was pointless as the night was damn hot. it was late around three that time. 

although my eyes barely opened, my mind was not in rest. even the noise of tapping keyboard sounded like a construction to my ear. 
 
the worst part was nightmare. to call it a nightmare, it was quite real and ghostly, though.

shit you, whatever you are!

Sunday, February 20, 2011

exhausted week

this week i barely had enough sleep and i dont know how long this body can take. my week was damn hectic, even in weekend i had not be able to indulge myself with a good long sleep. T_T. and tomorrow i've got zillionth of things to be done for the career fair.

at this exact moment, while i am typing down word and word from this weary soul and body,  i miss my heavenly last years honeymoon when i joined nothing and became a lunatic who talked to the moon. it was  a pain in the arse and the mood was gloomy, nonetheless, it was a blissful and beautiful moment, beautiful pain. i miss the moment of me and me spending time together, singing/screaming some cool tracks from The Killers. man, that was a relief i tell ya.

i don't feel regret about joining activities, it just that i remorse to the old me who did not bother to join activities in university. imagine how wonderful my life could be if i met these wonderful people earlier, how many experience i could gain for two years, how cool my CV would be if i was active since the day i stepped on Penang. which is stupid lah, at this last semester i finally found the right place and people for me to dwell in.

no point of talking now, so to soothe the agony, a saying 'it's better late than never' is best too upgrade the positiveness. 
oh welllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll...........................................................................

Monday, February 14, 2011

valentine's fatwa

i know, i know it's haram and recently, government has called upon a front to oppose this Christian's celebration. smell fishy here.

personally, i think there's nothing wrong in celebrating Valentine's Day......and there will be voice saying
apa jahil sangat dia ni tak tahu ke history valentine's day?
yes, yes, i know the history, the pope valentine etc. it's the day that celebrates the winning of heathen over muslims. but hey, do the christians give a heck on this? most of them act like they are atheists and pagans who intentionally create almost all the vices devices in the entire globe.

the whole predicament actually lies within us, the Malaysian. The most agreeable problem  with the malaysian society, (malay people to be exact) they follow certain culture without having pure understanding in that. ok, maybe it is wrong to celebrate valentine's but still the concept of appreciating love is essentially needed regardless what religion you believed in. some of the malays, are moron enough to understand this holy concept by simply take the culture, celebrate it like all the weterners did. copy and paste without any improvisations, oh malays do that all the time kan.

to me, what the government did is utterly a waste of time and effort. it is not the day that should be 'haram' it is the act of dating, mating, fucking without legal bond that should be taken care of. even without the V day, there will be two, three, thousands couples that will be having sex before marriage. we never know.

so why bother so much about the V's day? there is no harm in celebrating the V day, in fact, V's day celebration is for appreciating everyone that you loved, mom, dad, teachers, best friends, anyone could be. the harm is in the human temperamental vices.

on top of this funny Malaysian matter, all of sudden the politicians who are previously mute and deaf when it comes to religion affairs, are now standing in line together-gather to oppose this day. boohooo!!  anyway, i've read from Faisal Tehrani's blog which talks on the V's day as well, he suggested to implement our own muslim love's day which is on 1st Zulhijjah, prior to the date of Ali and Fatimah Az Zahra got married.

sound brilliant to me.
and oh, happy V's (vendetta, valentine, virgin, viagra) day.

spread the love. save the semen. save the virgin.

monday rantings

i miss my restless soul. the one that bitches everyday, the one who finds wrath in every hateful thing. the one who condemns and complaints like she owns the world. i miss that restless bitch. 

being busy made me forget the bliss of devilish manner. i have noticed that in 2011 i did not yet bitching about how terrible life can be. and i cursed lesser so far. not that i proud to announce myself as a haughty girl who loves to vomit the obscene words, but as you can see there are flying cherubs behind me and the halo on top of this very head. :)

at this exact moment i am busy with the unimportant act class, the preparation of career days, the endless assignments for minor and majors, and of course the tests. knowing the play only costs us 10%, it got me discouraged me to be serious and excited about staging it. the problem lies not within the play, but it is because of our lecturer, Dr. Low Batt, who had sold our time and soul to the art lecturer, namely Gaylord. leaving me and some of the unsatisfied colleagues in wrath seeing Dr. Low Batt is powerless in front of the Gaylord.

and so we had to spent extra hours every week just to learn the so-called-acting lessons. in class, this morning we did the voice projection, projecting the voice that coming out from the belly, blablabalblaldavmla. i was a failure at this. and heck la you to expect me to have the voice volume increased by the staging day. if the requirements need us to project our voice loudly and to have excessive gesture while talking, where goes the need of understanding the content. now, this is just pointless and full of shit, right?

talking of shit, a wicked bird had left his mark on my shawl, right at my shoulder. i was talking to Won Lin, and suddenly came Maggie, pointing her index finger at the greenish-yellowish shit that was right on my shoulder. and there goes 'eeeeewwww' 'yeeeswwww' 'yuckkkks, oooooo like i love to be the loo of the birds laa. cisss!! alas, it was actually a good joke in Monday's afternoon. after spending nights thinking on how to complete the Othello's essay, good laughter is truly needed. 

oh well.

Sunday, February 13, 2011

the disastrous DIY attempts

when i lost my favourite black jeans, i made an urgent purchase of a pair of gray jeans. wore that in Langkawi for the first time and it got discolored at the first washing. disappointed i was, i decided to dye the pants black and it looked pretty much the same, in fact uglier than before. the uglification was done by the floor cleaners who were responsible to wash the floor level in which resulting the multiple little brown spots spattered over the buttocks of the pants. desperate, i inclined to bleach the whole pants and shamefully asked dhiya for a bottle of clorox. thanks to you dhiya. :) know what happened next?

i've got myself a pair of hideous brown pants. the colour of faeces. horribly fugly pants i have. 
*sigh

not only the pants that is fucked up, i dyed my white cardigan as well. it turned out as a hideous grayish cardigan. the colour was uneven, which make it looked like a sweater that one used while working in the coal mine. there is no turning back, so i uglified the cardigan once again by tie-dying the cardigan with black fabric dye but i know it will be just another disaster.

oh well. :|

Saturday, February 12, 2011

ramble on Jazz

yes, there is an old lady trapped inside of this 22-year-old body who found Ella Fitzgerald, Engelbert Humperdinck and the much younger singer, Michael Buble are divine singers. my brother said my playlist is boring. my best cousin said so too. my friend erna, refused to listen me whine about this old stuff. but i am really into this old swing music that the generation of today thinks as the lamest.

to begin with, Jazz is an ageless music. it doesn't grow old and die, only the Jazz singers are aging and dead. it was my lecturer who had first drawn my attention of jazz when she introduced a song called 'lets call the whole thing off' sang by Ella Fitzgerald. the song was classic, cool enough that it raised the attention of the whole class as we learned about accent in linguistic class. the song talks of two different accents, English and America and what it tries to convey is that no matters how different the English of these two regions might sound they can still understand each other. 

and so i began searching and downloading the jazz songs. at first it was only for the sake of finding serenity in studying, i cannot focus when listening to some dum dam gaga bieber when it comes to study.  i don't even like them. then the music came naturally to me, calming the restless soul, sweetly humming me to sleep, enlightening the gloomy days by its soulful harmony. in a simple word i love it. 

there is a friend, who claimed that he missed to listen to acid jazz. i don't even know how the acid jazz sounded like, but i guess, jazz are pretty much the same. so i  commented his status, 'was it something like Ray Charles', and he kind of condemned me of how lame it is to be listening to this old blind man. i replied to him 'jazz is ageless'. how can you love Jazz without loving its roots. and oh, i was pretty mixed up, Ray Charles was pretty much R&B during his time. 

after reading through some webs, namely Wiki, i sort of able to distinguish what is Jazz and what is Blues, what is what. Norah Jones is not really the sub of Jazz, Ray Charles also. so the truly jazz singer in my playlist are Ella Fitzgerald, Engelbert Humperdinck, Frank Sinatra, Diana Krall and of course, Michael Buble. still, i think this is debatable. good music needs not to be categorized because for everyone's ear and heart there is only one folder of the good music, which you and i have are nothing identical.

after all, i am just an avid listener of jazz and i am such a loser in playing musical instruments. still my music selections are considerably peculiar because i am forever deadly in love with Alex Turner and Alex Kapranos.

sincerely 
from me who haven't had the talent. 

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

self reminder

hantu mana yang rasuk aku sampai jadi pemalas dan bebal tahap mahamerongwangsa.

so aku buat entri ini as a reminder in future if there is a failure, nah ini buktinya.


katil, kau sangat mengancam.

Sunday, February 6, 2011

boredom strikes


from someone's tumblr. :)

only the truth

Girls are like
apples on trees. The best
ones are at the top of the tree.
The boys don’t want to reach for
the good ones because they are afraid
of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they
just get the rotten apples from the ground
that aren’t as good, but easy. So the apples
at the top think something is wrong with
them, when in reality, they’re amazing.
They just have to wait for the right
boy to come along, the one
who’s brave enough
to climb
all the way
to the top
of the tree.




*reposted from here. great blog, great people!