Monday, February 9, 2015

It's always a random talk on feeling.

I just have the urge to write. I have tonnes to talk about, knowing how rusty I have become, it is a hard work just to write. Currently, I am listening to Lay Me Down by Sam Smith, while secretly posting this online from the office.

The company is in the hassle of restructuring, and I don't really have a task to do since I will be transferred internally. Finally I am able to run from the mundane routine, but then  having much time to think and study in the internet are no fun too. Talking about work, I will be placed in the reporting team and will soon need to learn asap on how to deliver the performance analysis report. New thing, and it has always been my dream. I guess. The good thing in this "malay" company, they recognize my strength, and will probably use it till the end, I wouldn't mind of working too hard.

Anyway, yesterday, a cousin from mom's side had delivered a beautiful baby girl and I took the chance to introduce fiance to my maklong. On our way back home, we teased each other on how ready we are to become parents. He is wholeheartedly ready, and I am still fidgeting, maybe half of it. But then, I always know deep down I have that talent of nurturing the babies. (talking about the past experience).

Later on, we talked on how much I have grown to be. It is just that, I am indeed growing old and boring and I am not sure whether it is a good thing or a bad thing. These days, the journey towards our big day, is not a smooth sailing. We have fights over and over again over teeny tiny petty matters which later at the end of our day, we both agree those petty fights are beyond ridiculous. But then, as what as everyone been advised, these rows are normal and the feeling of 'idontwanttogetmarried' is definitely common.

Sadly true, that I cannot get the joy of spending at this age, but then deep down I believe that I will get that fucking chance to travel around and spend like nobody business. And that would be probably after 5 years of it. 26, engaged and employed, credit-cardless. Checked.